Slim shaming: the ugly truth

I feel like these days all we are surrounded by is curvy people complaining they are being verbally tortured by the society and I’m starting to get tired out of instagram motivation to “eat what you want” and “be happy and love your curves”.Not because I do not appreciate every human being and certainly not because I think there is something wrong with being curvy, my issue is of a much bigger value and I would like to raise awareness about it. What is really going on is no longer a matter of “fat shaming” but of “slim shaming”.

In light of recent events in Paris, where there has been set a fine for modelling agencies if you are “approaching anorexia” and “size 0”, a light bulb has started to flash above my head and make me think of the bigger picture. Since I was a little kid I have had many friends around me that have been very skinny and shamed for that, and telling a naturally skinny girl to “eat a hamburger” can cause a much bigger damage than telling an obese person to lose weight. It is no different thing to ridicule a person that has a condition where his metabolism is faster than usual and can’t put on weight, than it is to make fun of someone with a condition where they can not lose weight. And because our society is built up that way, that when someone is perceived as a weak and not enough supported person, it becomes a nation-wide discussed topic, a global problem and the internet aficionados start a war-like situation fighting against those bullies. Oh but wait, where are those people when skinny girls that can not do anything about their condition are being called words and being told to “eat hamburgers”? Because it is really bugging me how The Importance of Having Kardashian Ass has become less of a problem than million women who are struggling to be accepted as skinny and equally beautiful.

Furthermore (I start sounding like my essays, apologies.), speaking from experience, feeling good about yourself when being very skinny is also an existing thing, and it is nothing bad nor threatening. I lost a lot of weight a year ago and I felt wonderful, I did not care that guys were calling me a “stick girl” and girls criticizing me I do not have an ass, I felt happy. Isn’t that what is important? Being happy with who you are! When I came to London I was surprised that even celebrities who I met told me “Joanna, you need to put on weight!”, I was so scared and ashamed of myself that I started eating more, exercising and trying to be the definition of fit and healthy, I gained 5 kg and what happened? I feel unhappy now, I feel like I lost one of the things I loved about myself and I feel oppressed by the society who thinks curvy is better than skinny. And you know what people? You succeeded in making me feel miserable.. for 5 minutes. Because I realised that the issue of slim shaming is much bigger than the issue of fat shaming and I will gladly not eat 3 times a day and go back to being very skinny, than I will be crying at night because I know I am not feeling happy about my body.

I know I will receive a lot of criticism about this, a lot of questions would arise in your head as well, but I want you, just for a second to think about what you are causing to people when you are telling them they look too thin. And this is the ugly truth, by telling someone they need to gain weight, you are standing in the way of their own perceptions of what is right and you are taking away their right to be happy. So, starting today, my main objective is to please myself by looking very skinny, not everyone else just so they feel better about themselves. And this is not only addressed to the oppressors, but to all of my underweight friends that are being called what not on a regular basis and that have cried themselves to sleep not once because society made them believe they were not worthy because their legs are not touching each other. You are all beautiful, very skinny, very fat, as long as you are happy, do whatever you want. And do not let anyone tell you otherwise.

 

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